Notes On A Film: Bad Lieutenant – Port Of Call: New Orleans

Bad Lieutenant (I shall stop calling it by its full title) is wonderfully bonkers, deliriously barmy, utterly mental and stupidly entertaining. It shouldn't be, but the combination of the fantastic over-the-top performance from Nicolas Cage as the titular policeman and the crazy sensibility that Werner Herzog creates for the film to inhabit creates a unique experience that allows for the madness and encourages you to go along with it.

The story is relatively straightforward: Cage is Terence McDonagh, a cop with a back injury, an addiction to painkillers and other less legal drugs (acquired from the evidence room), a prostitute girlfriend (Eva Mendes, who obviously enjoyed so much being Cage's love interest in Ghost Rider that she's back for seconds), alcoholic parents, and a murder case where six illegal immigrants were executed in a drug-related crime. He's also in debt to his bookie, and he's angered some powerful people when he roughed up a non-paying customer of his girlfriend. To try to work things out, he gets in with the gangster he's investigating, Big Fate.

Where things are not so conventional is how the story is told. Cage's performance is of the sort of full-on roles from his early days, his voice doing strange things dependent on the level of drug intake. The scene where the gangsters shoot some guys who after him, and he shouts, 'Shoot him again! His soul is still dancing!' as he laughs hysterically is hilarious. The other aspect is the way in which Herzog shoots the film. In the soul-shooting scene, we actually see the ghost of the dead man breakdancing. Just because. Also, there is a scene where we watch Cage and other officers (including an underused Val Kilmer – hearing him called Cage 'good po-lice', as if we were in The Wire, was worth it alone) on stakeout from the point of view of two lizards in the room with them (who may or may not be a figment of Cage's imagination). Why? Just because. Those are two extreme examples; it's the vibe he conjures up that allows you to go along with the craziness and enjoy it. The denouement of the investigations is so unbelievable that any other film would ridiculously convenient, but here it just works because of the rest of the movie. It shouldn't work but it does.

The earlier incarnation of this film – the Harvey Keitel-starring and Abel Ferrera-directed version – was a tough watch, with a raw performance from Keitel, and is a strange inspiration for this version. However, a crazy Nic Cage and a bizarre melding of arthouse and mainstream from Herzog makes for an insanely entertaining and entertainingly insane police drama.

Rating: DAVE 

[Explanation of my updated film rating system]

Notes On A Film: Robin Hood

If you want to enjoy this film, ignore the fact that its title is Robin Hood; treat it as a historical fantasy and you will find some entertainment value out of this slightly above average but inoffensive action film. I’m not saying that Robin Hood should be historically accurate – the mythological idea of Robin Hood is much more real than any ancient documents could ever provide – or should slavishly follow the Walter Scott-inspired storylines that we know so well, but don’t use the name Robin Hood to tell a different story.

You know the tale of Robin Hood – in Sherwood Forest, with his Merry Men, robbing from the rich, giving to the poor, fighting against the Sheriff of Nottingham. Right? Well, not here because that’s too small for such a legendary figure. Instead, he is an archer in King Richard’s army (as Richard fights his way back from the Crusades), who has a chat with Richard, ends up bringing back the crown and sceptre to England when Richard is killed (historically inaccurate) by pretending to be a knight, ends up impersonating him for the dead knight’s father, and stops an invasion of England by the French. And, in addition, this Robin Hood’s father came up with the original idea for the Magna Carta. A little bit different, I’m sure you’ll agree.

If you want to know why this story is such a mess, then you might find the story of how this film moved into production more interesting. An original spec script by Ethan Reiff and Cyrus Voris, called Nottingham, was bought by Universal Pictures after an aggressive bidding contest with other interested parties (including Ridley Scott, who was then brought in to direct). It was an intriguing twist on the myth: it told the story from the point of view of the Sheriff of Nottingham, a man with a tough job of taxing the people under the orders of the king, and how he has to deal with the threat of a brigand stealing from him; this he does with vaguely scientific methods. Now, if you’re going to make a new film on an old tale, this is exactly the sort of thing to do. However, what happens next changes everything: Russell Crowe is attached to star. At 45, Crowe is the oldest actor to play Robin Hood, older even that Sean Connery when he played an old Robin Hood in Robin and Marion, which is why they had to get Cate Blanchett to replace Sienna Miller as Maid Marion, because it would have looked like he was wooing his daughter; it’s hard to believe in Crowe as the starting point for the Robin legends in a film that is effectively Robin Hood: The Origin. Because Crowe is the money star, he needs a money director to keep him happy. He wants his chum, Ridley Scott. When Scott came on board, he is quoted as saying the script (which he wanted to buy) was ‘shit’ and needed a page one rewrite. Because Scott wanted to do his take on the Robin Hood story (via his obsession with the Crusades – see Kingdom of Heaven), and was using this film to do it. Brian Helgeland was brought in to rewrite the script – i.e. come up with a completely new story – which is as feeble with historical fact as England’s defence was against Germany in the World Cup (something that’s more egregious when previous screenwriter Reiff is a bit of a history buff and points out the inaccuracies, such as Robin being an archer in the army when in fact King Richard was in trouble with the Vatican for his use of crossbows). For more details, see read this excellent blog post about it all by the screenwriter William Martel, this article in the Evening Standard, and go to this site for the script for Nottingham (which also has an interview with Reiff).

To counteract my negativity, I should say that there is some good stuff here. Ridley Scott, even though he hates writers, does direct a beautiful film and there are some well-choreographed scenes, such as the attack on a French castle and the repelling of the French invasion force on the beach. The acting is good – Cate Blanchett makes for a feisty and intelligent Marion, Mark Strong is excellent as the villainous Godfrey (making it a hat-trick of top bad guys after Stardust and Kick-Ass), and William Hurt brings some gravitas as William Marshal. Oscar Isaac has fun as Prince John, Danny Huston is fun as King Richard, and Mark Addy makes for a good Friar Tuck. However, the weakest aspect is Crowe – he makes for a suitably noble hero, all glowering strength (perhaps channelling Maximus a bit too much), but his accent really is all over the place; Yorkshire, Lancashire, Midlands, hints of Irish and even Welsh float through his flat delivery, which is frankly ridiculous (and I’m glad Mark Lawson pulled him up on it on Radio 4). At least Kevin Costner was using a consistently bad accent …

If this film had tried to be its own entity – there are constant little references to Robin Hood legend, such as the throwaway use of the phrase ‘Merry Men’, having him fight with Little John, Will Scarlet as a musician, which seemed tagged on rather than organic – it would have been much more enjoyable. It’s a complete fantasy about how one man can change the course of history, with plenty of action and some dry humour and warmth; however, by calling itself Robin Hood, effectively using franchise recognition to kick-start a massive Hollywood period blockbuster, it can only fail on its own terms and in comparison to other, better films.

Rating: DVD

[Explanation of my updated film rating system]

Notes On A Film: Four Lions

The thing about Four Lions is that it shouldn’t be funny. The story of a group of radicalised British Muslims who decide on a suicide bomb attack in the UK sounds exactly like the sort of material that is antithetical to comedy; however, this film is hilariously, hugely, warmly funny, just as the poster suggests.

Even though this film is the brainchild of Chris Morris, the man behind the likes of On The Hour, The Day Today and Brass Eye (all hilarious but intelligent ridiculing of the media), there is still the idea that the film will be serious but that the laughs will be sporadic. This is a film about a serious subject, but Morris and co-writers Sam Bain and Jesse Armstrong (who can include Peep Show, The Thick Of It and In The Loop in their resumes) have written a really funny character piece that produces great lines and funny moments among the drama.

The film works because of the actors playing the terrorist cell: Riz Ahmed as Omar, the head of the group, with a loving wife and son; Kayvan Novak as Waj, his incredibly thick but lovable brother; Nigel Lindsay as Barry, the white convert (who gets moody when the others speak in Urdu to highlight his lack of authenticity); Arsher Ali as Hassan, the pseudo-rapper who wants to be a terrorist because it’s cool; and Adeel Akhtar as Fessal, the moronic bomb-maker who tries to use crows to deliver bombs (see the poster) and who thinks he is disguised when he uses the same voice (although supposed to be different) to buy vast quantities of liquid peroxide for his bombs from the local wholesale shop. The interplay between these characters, particularly Omar and Waj (who argue and banter like real brothers), is fantastic and their great delivery provides comedy in the mundanity of their pathetic attempts to be terrorists. It’s the little moments, like when they start listening to Arabic-sounding music on the drive to the suicide bomb attack but end up gustily singing along to Dancing In The Moonlight (while Barry glowers), that add up to a complete picture. There are some more familiar faces – Julia Davis and Kevin Eldon (old Morris hands from Jam), Darren Boyd (Saxondale, Green Wing, Smack The Pony), Alex Macqueen (The Thick Of It/In The Loop) – but it is the relative unknowns who hold your attention throughout.

This is also a thoughtful and moving film – Morris is said to have done years of research into the area, and there is heart in the story, including the loving family of Omar (his wife telling him that, during a time where he doesn’t want to a suicide bomber any more, he doesn’t have the same spark is heartbreaking) and Omar’s realisation of how far down this road he has taken his idiot brother, whom he has convinced that his reward in the afterlife will be like the rubber dinghy rapids ride at Alton Towers, meaning that there is more than just the constant laughter. Four Lions is a smart and very funny film, despite the fact that it is obviously Sheffield they are filming in when they are supposed to be in London – if they could afford a trip to Spain to film the scenes for the trip to a Pakistan terrorist training camp, couldn’t they have come to the real London?

Rating: DAVE

[Explanation of my updated film rating system]

Comics I Bought 25 March 2010

On the day that England went out of the World Cup, it's time to talk about a few comics. Fortunately, I had Lego Harry Potter to entertain me instead of the football ...

Nemesis #1
I really don't know why I bought this – it's a textbook example of a Mark Millar comic: a high concept (that other people have used before, but let's ignore that ...), boosted to the extreme in all sections, especially the violence, and with pop culture dialogue and referencing. I think that I have finally had my fill of Millar comics – this shall be my last one. Even Steve McNiven's art isn't enough to keep me entertained, because it's not up to his usual standards, with an odd inking style instead of the clean lines of previous comics.

Supergod #3
On the other hand, there is Warren Ellis being Warren Ellis, and I haven't had enough of his particular style of comic books. This is Ellis dialogue in the mouths of scientists and god-like beings created by scientists, examining the concept of the superhuman in a 'real world' situation. I'm enjoying this comic book, from the basic idea to the execution to the art by Garrie Gastonny to the fact that the line 'Space Jesus' was used in this book; what I'm not enjoying is the wait between books. Please pick up the pace, because I would like to find out what happens.

X-Factor #203
This comic should have a warning: the contents of the cover of this book do not occur inside. Unless I missed the dinosaurs somewhere ... Still, the book has Guido cracking jokes and fighting Mindless Ones, Monet captured by Baron Mordo, in what is quite a diversion from the normal X-Factor storylines, particularly after they've just had the renumbering and the attending hype. I'm sure Peter David knows what he's doing, but it's an odd decision. Depends on if you enjoy David's work, and I still do.

Bloggus Immobilis

There will be no notes on comic books or films or books or anything else today: I'm too busy being a boy wizard in Lego-bricks-computer-game form ...

Comics I Bought 18 March 2010

I seem to have bought more comics than I remember in the month of March so far, with three weeks of five comics each (which is rather a lot for me). Although I won't be chatting about one of them today (Avengers vs Atlas #3), I've still got a lot to get through, so let's crack on.

Fables #93
This is a typically good issue of Fables, as King Ambrose must hold the trial of the goblin who ate a squirrel in the kingdom of Haven, with all seeming outcomes ending in trouble. It's a thoughtful story, which cleverly uses the story of the scorpion (here given the wonderful name of Gallifar Strikeswift) and the frog to illustrate the essence of nature as the basis of the defence. It's great stuff, as usual, and I even liked David Lapham's fill-in art this issue.

Hercules: Fall of an Avenger #1
And so the funeral (yeah, right) of Hercules, as heroes tell their stories, such as Thor and Namor, as well some ladies in Herc's life (Namora, Snowbird, Black Widow and the Queen of the Dark Elves, Alflyse, who wins the best storyteller award with the caption, 'Twenty-eight graphic minutes later'), before Athena arrives to ruin the mood. Ariel Olivetti's art is a suitable mix of the epic and and the small, with a nice painterly feel, but it's Greg Pak and Fred Van Lente's show, as they effectively pay tribute to themselves for the great work they've done on the Incredible Hercules series. There is also a back-up story written by Paul Tobin, where Namora and Venus deal with Hercules' estate and have the unfortunate task of informing people of Herc's death. This is a very well-told little story, which feels as important as the main story.

Joe The Barbarian #3
The story of Joe's quest continues, as he meets dwarf pirates and the fantasy world (where he is called The Dying Boy and told of a destiny) reflects the real world (a bizarre mosaic of Joe's face becomes his reflection in the bathroom mirror), and the end of the issue sees Joe lying on the floor and otherworldly creatures are seen looking at him through a television screen, talking of 'another world'. This is really enjoyable, made even better by Sean Murphy's art, which is pitch-perfect for this book.

Spider-Woman #7
I'm trying to remain even-tempered when talking about this book, but I find myself getting rather angry about it. The seventh issue of what was supposed to be an ongoing series ends, basically because Alex Maleev got tired of drawing Spider-Woman (according to the afterword from Bendis). There's something about drawing the motion comic being the equivalent of drawing 22 issues of the comic, but I'm sorry – that's a really feeble excuse. Bendis goes on about not wanting to do it without Maleev, so that's it – talk about leaving a bad taste in the mouth. And, to add insult to injury, Marvel charge an extra dollar for the book as well. I'm rather pissed off about this book, and want to forget about them as soon as possible.

Comics I Bought 11 March 2010

This project – writing my thoughts on all my entertainments that I didn't write about at the time – is really beginning to confuse my sense of time, especially when I power through several weeks in the course of a few days. I have no idea in which chronological direction my brain is heading ...

Batman and Robin #10
The decision to use different artists for each three-issue stretch of Batman and Robin means that at least it comes out on a very regular basis, which is good. And, apart from the Tan issues, the artists have been good, and Andy Clarke is no different – he's got a nice, clear line and a straightforward storytelling approach. This is the start of the return of Bruce Wayne, and I love the idea of the clues being left in Wayne Manor being decoded by Dick and Damian, and the mere notion of a lost Garden of Death makes me happy. If you haven't guessed, I'm really enjoying this comic book.

Criminal: The Sinners #5
This is the thing about Criminal: it's really good but it's hardcore and just a little depressing, even if it's inevitable. Everything comes together, and Lawless does what he can to stand by his word and doing the right thing, but there is violence and pain and resolution. Another excellent final chapter from Brubaker and Phillips.

Ex Machina #48
The art by Tony Harris has been excellent on this series, and the first half of this book is equally top notch, but then the art seems to degenerate, perhaps to reflect the emotional state of Mitchell Hundred as he finds out that his mother is dead, but it is still rather jarring. Brian K Vaughan has written a great story, with a great central character, good dialogue and good plotting. I can't wait for the final issue.

Powers #3
Although I like Mike Avon Oeming's art, this issue is mostly left to him to illustrate a pissed-off superwoman trying to kill her daughter who is in a car with Walker and his partner – there's not much dialogue and the action is confusing and rather ugly compared with normal. The issue isn't helped by a deus ex machina – Billy Mace (from Walker's days in the Flying Eagles, a flashback to which is the best part of this book) knocks the head off the crazed would-be killer. Not one of the best issues of Powers I've read.

The Unwritten #11
Tommy is Logos – the word made flesh (according to Lizzie) – he can only be hurt in stories, he meets (and heals) the novel Jud Süss, and they return to normality three months after they were last there, a few days before the publication of the new Tommy Taylor novel. This is a rip-roaring issue of The Unwritten, with the only difference to normal being the inking on Peter Gross' art – the finishes by Jimmy Broxton make his art look a bit more like normal comic book art, without that nice thick line he usually applies. Apart from that, really good stuff and leaving things on edge for the next issue.

Comics I Bought 4 March 2010

I'm into the comics I bought in March of earlier this year – the tantalising prospect of being up to date with my comic purchases draws ever nearer ...

Astro City: The Dark Age Book Four #2
I'm sure that this is good, but I've given up caring about it. The Dark Age story has been going just a little too long, and I've never connected to the Royal brothers the way that I have with other characters in Astro City – this lack of empathy has made it seem even longer. I'm waiting for the end ...

The Boys #40
This issue sees Garth Ennis ridiculing the Legion of Super-Heroes, which is a bit of a soft target and rather dated, thus making the jokes a little weak (although I can't help laughing at the hero with Tourette syndrome, because I've got the sense of humour of an adolescent, a bit like Ennis himself). However, he also makes them endearing, helped by the art of Darick Robertson, who always make this book look better. This issue also sees Butcher get the wrong end of the stick regarding Hughie being in a relationship with superheroine Annie, which can only end badly ... The Boys is looking good.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer #33
The issue with the reveal (which was ruined several months previously deliberately, seemingly, by Dark Horse because the book wasn't selling as well as it should) – Angel is Twilight. Yawn ... At least there were some good jokes, such as Andrew dressed with Luke Skywalker's X-wing helmet, an Iron Man glove, a Punisher logo, Captain America's shield and a Bat utility belt, or the easy joke about Twilight the book/films [Buffy: 'Y'know I lived that idea first, right? (And my vampire was so much better.)']. Still, the comic is better than it's been in a while.

Detective Comics #862
I still feel sorry for Jock having to follow JH Williams on art duties, but he does a good job because his craggy, sharp stylings are perfectly suited for Batman and Batwoman. He works well with Rucka, who sets up a nice parallel between Batman and Batwoman's investigations/fights, which Jock draws really well. However, there is one fault to this story – Batman gets stabbed and knocked out of an ambulance by an ordinary man; this should not happen, it's the entire point of Batman, that he's better than normal humans because he has made himself so. Rucka makes up for it with the 'Commissioner Gordon's daughter?' joke in the Question Second Feature, which is still well drawn by Cully Hamner.

Girl Comics #1
I really wanted to like this comic. Even though it is a stupid title, and it's a rather sad state of affairs that Marvel has to publish a special mini-series created by women only, I'm glad that it exists and wanted to support it. However, I didn't like this comic book – the cover by Amanda Conner is the best thing about it. I didn't see the point of the Nightcrawler story (and I didn't like the art by Ming Doyle), the Venus story by Trina Robbins is cute and clever but insubstantial, the Punisher story by Valerie D'Orazio is quite amusing for the first page but a waste of space for the remaining three pages, the Doctor Octopus two-pager is cute and doesn't outstay its welcome, but the Franklin and Valeria story is an illustrated prose tale rather than a comic, and the final story by Devin Grayson and Emma Rios about the boring Scott/Jean/Logan triangle was rather weak on all fronts. I feel bad for not enjoying this book, but I doubt it makes me look any less bad for disliking a book created by women.

Comics I Bought 25 February 2010

A lot to get through in this post, with five books to cripple my bank account and entertain me.

Batman and Robin #9
Wasn't I talking about issue 8 only the other day? This catch-up thing can confuse me ... This is the final part of the zombie Batman three-parter, with Alfred standing up to him with a cricket bat. Best line goes to Dick: 'I'm in the middle of a serious team-up.' Fun comics from Morrison and Stewart.

Chronicles of Wormwood: Last Battle #3
I enjoyed the first Chronicles of Wormwood mini-series but I'm not enjoying this one so much; I don't know if it's the art by Oscar Jimenez, which feels over-rendered, or the direction of the story, but I don't feel the same connection as before. There's some interest in it, as Wormwood gives Maggie a brief glimpse of Heaven and Jay phones up a talk radio show and told them he was Jesus Christ, but it's going to have to turn things around a lot before I start feeling it.

Fantastic Four #576
I'm worried: yes, Hickman is planning something; yes, Eaglesham draws a pretty comic; yes, it experiments with telling a lot of the story with no dialogue; but this doesn't feel like an issue of a comic book. It feels like the precis of a comic book, just the notes that Hickman wrote to be filled out later. I've lost the sensation of the first few issues of this run and I'm not sure if it's worth buying any more.

Usagi Yojimbo #126
If you want reliability, Stan Sakai is your man – this is another excellent issue of Usagi Yojimbo, and it's really fun as well, as Usagi deals with a Nukekubi, a creature from Japanese folklore that is a flying that eats flesh, and yet still has a happy ending. The sort of book that leaves a smile on your face and a good feeling in your heart.

X-Factor #202
Peter David certainly knows how to do funny and he does good superhero comic books, but sometimes the pieces don't quite fall into place. The conclusion to this story that started the renumbered X-Factor wasn't as satisfying as the preceding chapters, as if it was trying too hard to be too clever. Still, not a failure by any means, with a well-handled Doom, learning about Layla's reasons for staying with Doom and some fun with the Fantastic Four.

Comics I Bought 18 February 2010

An incomplete discussion today: also included in the purchases from the comic shop were Avengers vs Atlas #2 and Incredible Hercules #141, but they will be discussed separately (and I really must get round to doing that soon), so only two books today.

Joe the Barbarian #2
For a relatively straightforward Grant Morrison comic, this is still fun and yet play to Morrison's obsession with the fiction and reality. Watching out protagonist Joe (or The Dying Boy as his toys call him in his hallucination) as he traverses his house on one level of reality and the fantasy world of his hallucinations, with his mouse Jack now a 6-foot tall warrior called Chakk, is a delight especially when drawn with such flair by Sean Murphy. I'm not sure I get all the connections but I'm enjoying the journey.

Spider-Woman #6
The story in this issue is fairly basic: Spider-Woman fights the Thunderbolts, and Bendis decides to let Maleev do most of the work for once, keeping dialogue to a minimum. But Maleev's strength isn't action scenes – they don't come off as well as the rest of his art, and everything looks over-processed. There are also splash pages that are supposed to be impressive but aren't – the page of Jessica escaping an explosion looks like they forgot to draw a background, and the double-page spread at the end has detailed background but isn't interesting and Jessica looks slightly off. Maleev also succumbs to the modern malaise of drawing breasts and female backsides (such as the opening double-page spread). An interesting if unsuccessful experiment.

Comics I Bought 11 February 2010

It's late on a Sunday evening, I've played far too much Super Mario Galaxy 2 (I see star bits when I close my eyes), and it's time to carry on with talking about comics I obtained back in February.

Batman and Robin #8
The title of the chapter says it all: Batman Vs. Batman, as Dick Grayson fights a dead copy of Batman. Grant Morrison keeps everything bubbling along nicely (I love the Geordie gang boss) but he stands aside to let Cameron Stewart take centre stage with some great art and great fight scenes. This is just fun comics – long may it continue.

Strange #4
I still would have preferred the interior art to have been provided by cover artist Tomm Coker rather than Emma Rios (especially as the contrast is so strong), and I'm not sure I buy the 'operating on the universe' (in the form of Eternity) as the visualisation for saving day, but Mark Waid ties things together neatly and satisfyingly as always, although with a sacrifice (to mark the consequences of magic) to set up possible future stories. Although this is well told, I don't know if it qualifies as a sufficiently important story for a Dr Strange mini-series – shouldn't it have been something more significant than teaching an apprentice?

The Unwritten #10
The Unwritten is a really good book – it's smart, thoughtful, funny and it's about something – but it gets even better with this chapter because it uses a real example of the thin boundary between reality and fiction and the power of fiction to create another reality. In this case, it is the German propaganda film Jud Süss, which is completely anti-Semitic but was in fact based on a novella (itself based on the life of a historical figure) that was pro-Jewish. It is an amazing piece of history and it's something I wouldn't have known about if it hadn't been for this comic book. And the comic book ends on a great cliffhanger – thank you, Carey and Gross.

Comics I Bought 4 February 2010

After moaning like a sad old man about digital comics yesterday, it's time to talk about the old-fashioned paper type again, as I get round to talking about comics I purchased for my entertainment back in February.

The Boys #39
For the most part, I didn't enjoy this issue: the art by John McCrea is not his best, and Ennis doesn't let his story flow naturally or fluidly, and the silly in-joke about 2000AD seems out of place. But then the last page makes the issue have a point, as Butcher sees Hughie with Annie; makes the comic almost worth it.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer #32
Now this was funny: I didn't think Brad Meltzer could do comedy so well. The in-jokes about comics in this book are very funny, as Xander geeks out on Buffy getting super-powers (best joke: 'Can you phase?'). Other things happen in this issue: the reason for Buffy's super powers is explained, a villain is revealed and we see where Giles, Faith and Andrew ended up. Nice to have the Buffy comic in the 'good' range again.

Criminal: The Sinners #4
Oh, Messrs Brubaker and Phillips: you do make a damned fine comic book. Tracy Lawless is put through the wringer, including getting shot, as he tries to keep his word. This is a great story – I hope it ends well (if you know what I mean).

Doom Patrol #7
And so ends my purchasing of this current iteration of Doom Patrol; this is the last issue that has Metal Men as a 'Second Feature', and the main story hasn't done enough to keep me coming back for more, even though the return of Crazy Jane from the Grant Morrison run did capture my attention for a brief moment. I don't think I'll regret my decision but we shall see – at least Metal Men (when Kevin Maguire was drawing, as he did this issue) was good, as was this last story, doing superhero sitcom as it should be.

The Question #37
I don't follow the DC universe much, let alone the big events, so Blackest Night didn't really impact me. However, much like when I bought Starman #81, the experiment to do another issue of a long-finished comic series drew me in to buy this comic. I have the original issues for Denny O'Neill's and Denys Cowan's run on The Question, and they were a real eye-opener for me with regards to the types of the comics that could be produced by a mainstream publisher. Philosophy, well-choreographed fight scenes, no sound effects and a thoughtful hero and an intriguing cast of characters. It was excellent and I can see why Greg Rucka is such a big fan of it. This issue sees the old and the new meet, as Charles Victor Szasz, the original Question, is brought back to life to meet the new Question, Renee Montoya, with the original creators (O'Neill, Cowan and Bill Sienkiewicz) and Greg Rucka (current writer of the current Question) providing a wonderful addition to the original stories. It's like things never changed but also without staying the same – it's smart, it's thoughtful, it has action, it has the same moody art. Thanks for this great footnote.

No Digital Comics For Me

I'm in a thought-sharing mood, so bear with me as I try to talk about something that's important to me but about which I don't know enough to provide any sort of actual analysis.

I love comic books (obviously) and I hope I will be ale to keep loving them; however, they are going through a transition at the moment, with the decline of the single issue (which is now hitting the $4 price, something that's too much for me), the rise of the trade paperback, torrenting of new comics online, and the rise of digital distribution. The future is uncertain, to say the least.

I love comic books, but they are expensive, and I can't keep buying them. However, I do prefer the hard copy – I may be old-fashioned, but I need the texture of something in my hands, being able to easily control the absorption of the art and story, and the comfort of actually possessing it. I read webcomics but long-form works are not enjoyable on a computer screen – I really like FreakAngels by Warren Ellis and Paul Duffield, but I don't enjoy the process of reading in my computer screen.

The supposed saviour of comics is the iPad – being able to buy them online and store them on your device for whenever you want and take your collection around with you. There are other devices, of course: reading comics on your mobile phone or other tablets, but the iPad is heralded as a winner in this arena. However, here's the problem I have with this solution: it's bloody expensive.

I can't afford to buy an iPad; I can't justify the expense of an iPhone, despite the seeming ubiquity of the smartphone that has changed the face of smartphones. On top of that, you need to have a mobile package where you have to spend another huge amount of money on top of that for unlimited internet downloads. Buying comics for your iPhone may be cheaper and better for trees, but the ability to buy and read your digital comics is very expensive.

I should add that I'm not an Apple hater – I'm just fine with PCs, and I don't define myself by owning a beautifully designed and easy to use device – and good luck to you if you own an iPhone or iPad, but I haven't been converted to the Church of Steve Jobs, mostly because I like to eat food and pay the bills and the mortgage, rather than pay for a piece of inessential electronic equipment.

I hope I don't come across as someone who is complaining because he doesn't have enough money to pay for his gadgets – I'm just perplexed by the concept that the future of comic books supposedly rests in buying an expense bit of kit at a time of recession when there is poverty and hunger and disease still in the world and the gap between rich and poor gets bigger. Until the time when the publishers decide to give up on printing comics on paper, I'll be buying my four-colour entertainments in traditional form.

Writing Every Day Is Hard. Who Knew?

This is one of those posts whingeing about maintaining a blog, so please feel free to skip this post and move on to something more interesting instead.

I'm not having a problem with finding material to write about – I've decided to catalogue all of my entertainment consumption, which means I'm still catching up on the films I've seen in the cinema (I'm up to April now), the comics I bought (I've reached February of this year), as well as trades, television, books without pictures and everything in between. Although the blog sucks up 'content' like a black hole of words, I don't find the blogging itself hard. It's the writing.

I have a full-time job, I like to exercise on a daily basis (where possible), and I obviously need time to go to the cinema, read all the comics, watch television programmes (I'm enjoying Warehouse 13 and Justified at the moment, for example) and play computer games (I'm losing hours to the bliss of Super Mario Galaxy 2 at the moment). And that's not even with the World Cup showing three football matches a day ... Finding the time to write and be happy with it is the problem and it's harder than I remembered.

Writing is tough – I don't think I'm particularly good at it yet, but I keep trying – and very time-consuming. I'd hoped that I would always have things written at least a day in advance so that I would have time to review it, add things where I'd forgotten and polish it where necessary. After nearly six months of daily blogging, this luxury has fallen by the wayside, and I feel that sometimes I'm not doing a sufficiently good job on the thoughts I'm writing (I don't think yesterday's post about Richard Herring's book was as complete as I wanted; there were other things I should have included) but I'm not giving myself enough time to complete the task because I'm forcing myself to keep to posting something every day. I can understand why some people end up posting visuals as part of their schedule.

Finding a balance in life is tough, and I guess I've found myself at the thin edge of that line, so this post is probably summed up by 'I'm a bit tired', which is a little pathetic really. I'm enjoying capturing my thoughts, and I'm enjoying the forcing myself to do it by the promise to myself of daily posting, but I didn't take into account how exhausting it can be. Even this is being written at the last minute, and I won't have any time to review what I've written and see if I've missed anything. But isn't that part of the fun?

Enough navel-gazing. Back to thoughts on pop culture again next time.

Book: How Not To Grow Up: A Coming Of Age Memoir. Sort of

By Richard Herring

I have been aware of Richard Herring since the Fist Of Fun days; I read his daily blog, I follow him on Twitter, I listen to his podcast with Andrew Collins and have been to one of his live shows (The Twelve Tasks of Hercules Terrace). I feel a connection of similarity – similar age, similar appreciation of comedy, did well at school, a tendency to over-think things – and I think he’s funny; however, despite this, he is sometimes a hard person to like. His belligerent attitude on the Collings and Herrin podcast (not typos) towards his ‘colleague’ is part of his comedy persona but it borders on the unpleasant; this has even transferred to the BBC 6 Music show, although with much less swearing. His constant belittling of Collins and his fans can be wearing, so it’s lucky he can be funny as well.

The reason for this introduction to talking about his book is that it can colour your view of Richard Keith Herring based on his honesty in this recounting of the year in his life around his 40th birthday. Based on his daily blog (he has kept a daily online journal for seven years, which is quite an achievement in itself, and the first year of which was turned into a book of its own from a smaller publisher), this is a reflection on the evaluation of his life as he approaches 40 and an assessment of who he is and what he wants from life. He talks about everything candidly (although names are changed to protect the innocent and guilty, apart from long-time friend and fellow performer Emma Kennedy), from his fighting with a trainee lecture to his awful diet to his desire for a threesome, a desire so strong he turned it into an Edinburgh show. As he nears 40, he reflects that he isn’t as successful as some of his contemporaries (he is good friends with Al Murray, and wrote his Sky sitcom, but Herring doesn't have an ITV series and asked to go on celebrity programmes), he isn't settled like his father – a career as a headmaster with wife and three kids – and isn't in a stable relationship; he's overweight, he drinks too much and tries to have sex with younger women all the time. He doesn't come across as particularly pleasant person, but he is intelligent and funny and comes across as thoughtful about moral issues – it is a contradiction.

There are sections in the book that do feel like they've simply been transcribed from his blog, rather than rewritten specifically for the book; however, there is a definite narrative to the book, as Herring moves from the bleakness of his existence (from his perspective) to a more positive outlook based on being in a proper relationship based on more than sexual attraction – he stops drinking, he goes to the gym more, he watches what he eats, he makes an effort to do the work of his 'job' (i.e. writing). This happy conclusion feels a little hollow if you've followed him subsequently, knowing that his weight oscillates from fat to slightly less fat, and the exercise doesn't last and alcohol still plays a part in his life, but you do feel happy for him finding happiness in a genuine relationship.

As someone who deals with words in my day job, I had a few niggles about the book itself. There are a few footnotes, about six in all, but they have been misnumbered, so that the text has a superscript number one but the bottom of the page says it is number two. There are words near the end of a line that have a line-breaking hyphen in them even though they are still on the same line. Also, I think that the book could have used a few more edits from Herring to finesse some of the writing, because it occasionally falls a little flat in the prose – the funny sections work well, but descriptive passages could have done with some better chosen words or phrases. However, the overwhelming feeling you get from the book, apart from laughter, is of a genuine, honest and heart-felt account of an interesting period in Herring's life, and I'm glad I bought the book (if only to pay him back for all the free podcasts and blog posts). A very enjoyable look at the life of a comedian who still enjoys being child-like but in an intelligent way.

Notes On A Film: Centurion

Another week, another slice of B-movie fun. Centurion is a small British film with a British take on the swords-and-sandals genre. Neil Marshall, writer/director of Dog Soldiers, The Descent and Doomsday, likes putting people in peril; the only difference here is that the people are Roman legionnaires, the time is 2,000 years ago and the place is Scotland (or Caledonia).

The story of this film is a take on the unknown story of the Ninth Legion – the popular version is that they were destroyed by the Picts, although nobody knows exactly what happened. Marshall uses this as a springboard for an enjoyable action thriller: Centurion Quintus (Michael Fassbender) is the only survivor of the destruction of a frontier Roman fort in Scotland, and he is rescued by the Ninth Legion, led by Virulus (Dominic West), who has been ordered to destroy the Picts, only to be betrayed by a mute Pict woman warrior (a great turn from Olga Kurylenko) – an epic ambush in a forest that is reminiscent of Gladiator and 300, leaving only a few survivors to flee back to England before the Pict search party.

The film is populated with a great cast – Fassbender is really good as the man of resolve leading the survivors, West is great as the hard-fighting, hard-partying general, and the group of survivors is filled with some good turns from the likes of David Morrissey, Noel Clarke and Liam Cunningham. There is some possibly anachronistic but still fun ribald dialogue to show the camaraderie of the soldiers, some great action in the first half of the film (where all of the fighting is; the fight scenes are violent and bloody and raw, with swords and spears going through bodies all over the screen), and the scenery is amazing – the vistas of Scotland are beautifully captured, making the stark harshness of the freezing countryside feel believable, an environment that must have been alien to the Romans (I'm amazed people were able to survive in that cold at that time; I'm amazed Scottish people can live there now).

Centurion is not brilliant, but it is good at what it is – a crunchy, brutal, visceral, thrilling little film that is what it is, with some nice moments and an ending that fits the story that went before it. I enjoyed it and hope it finds its audience on DVD.

Rating: DVD

[Explanation of my updated film rating system]

Notes On A Film: Repo Men

Repo Men is a simple, straight-up piece of genre B-movie; it knows what it is, it enjoys being what it is, and does it without embarrassment or pretension, and I enjoyed it for what it is. Because it is based on a novel by co-screenwriter Eric Garcia (The Repossession Mambo), it means that the story is worked out clearly, and the twists in the film are both clearly posted and set up earlier in the story (if you can't work out what is happening then you either haven't watched many movies or you weren't paying attention), and it gets on with the job in an efficient manner.

It is some time in the near future. Remy (Jude Law) is a top repo man for The Union, a company that has perfected artificial organs and sells them to people at prices with huge interest rates that means most customers will never be able to repay. Remy works with his childhood friend Jake (Forest Whitaker), who enjoys the life, but Remy wants a more stable life in sales so he can satisfy his wife's desire for him to have a less savoury job. On a job to harvest organs from a music producer he admires (RZA), Remy's heart defibrillator goes haywire and knocks him into a coma and he ends up with an artificial heart. Being unable to make the repayments, because he finds he can no longer harvest people who are essentially like him, Remy leaves the city with a woman whose body is full of organs that are past due, only for other repo men to come after him, which make him decide to do something that will get him out of The Union's system for ever.

The main attraction to this film is the visceral nature of the special effects – the blood flows freely and in large amounts, there is extreme violence (Law in a corridor attacking a bunch of executives with a hammer and a hacksaw, reminiscent of Old Boy; and there is a scene where Remy and his new girl are removing artificial organs from each other to clear their names is insane and intense) and it does it with abandon. It's weird seeing such a 'serious' cast in something like this: Oscar-nominated Law, Oscar winner Whitaker, Carice van Houten (from Black Book) under-used as Law's wife, Liev Schreiber as Law and Whitaker's slimy boss; it gives the film a sheen of respectability that less well-known names could not have provided. However, the film is enjoyable, with some flashes of humour (seeing a young Chinese girl reacting with joyous glee pulling out an artificial knee is hilarious) and nicely choreographed fight scenes with a solid story (with a timely idea regarding greedy corporate medical corporations). It's not changing the face of cinema or the greatest thing I've ever seen, but it was a very solid piece of entertainment.

Rating: DVD

[Explanation of my updated film rating system]

Blogging Postponed On Account Of Super Mario Galaxy 2

Normal service will be resumed as soon as I can drag myself away from this beautiful, brilliant, delightful, glorious game. Whenever that may be ...

Notes On A Film: Whip It

[This is a nice piece of content juxtaposition: on the evening that England play their first game of the 2010 World Cup campaign, I talk about a film about women doing roller derby. Actually, I'm amazed that I'm writing anything today: Super Mario Galaxy 2 arrived and that's been wonderfully addictive ...]

This is exactly the sort of film I would expect Drew Barrymore to make for her directorial debut, and it looks and sounds like exactly as I would imagine: good, quirky, eclectic, original, fun.

Whip It, written by Shauna Cross and based on her own semi-autobiographical novel, is about Bliss (Ellen Page), a teenage misfit in a small town in Texas who discovers an outlet in roller derby in Austin, although she does it secretly without her mother (Marcia Gay Harden) knowing about it, which is difficult when her mother wants her to enter beauty pageants like she did. Bliss is too young, but she still succeeds in getting on to Hurl Scouts, the nearest roller derby team, with the likes of Smashley Simpson (Barrymore), Maggie Mayhem (Kristen Wiig) and Bloody Holly (Zoe Bell). Through the roller derby, she finds something that makes figure out where she belongs and helps her to sort out other aspects of her life, including with her mother and father (Daniel Stern).

Even though this is a small film that mixes a teen drama with the sports movie (the roller derby is crunching, bruising and fun stuff, even though I found it completely implausible), there is a lot of energy and famous faces: in addition to those already mentioned, Jimmy Fallon is the roller derby announcer, Juliette Lewis is the arch-rival on the opposing roller derby team, and Arrested Development's Alia Shawkat as Bliss' best friend; the coach of the Hurl Scouts looks like a famous face, and I kept thinking that it should have been played by either Owen or Luke Wilson, but they went for the other brother Andrew (something I only realised after I watching the credits). Barrymore does a very good job, directing the actors well and providing a funky feel to the whole film, with a wonderfully diverse soundtrack (Young MC's Know How worked perfectly on top of the really cool end credit sequence) and a fun atmosphere to proceedings.

The film is charming and enjoyable, and the story doesn't take easy ways out – no character, even the supposed villains, are one-dimensional. The actors do a good job, and it's Page who comes out best, showing that Juno wasn't a fluke. It's a film that is about relationships but is not the soft approach of sappier movies; it's a little gem, and Barrymore has done herself proud.

Rating: DAVE

[Explanation of my updated film rating system]

Notes On A Film: Clash Of The Titans (3D)

The World Cup may be starting today, but I'm still catching up on films I saw in the cinema earlier this year. I've reached April (I talked about Kick-Ass when it came out at the time), for those of you at home keeping score, so I might even reach a time when I'll be able to talk about films when I actually see them.

Earlier this week, I talked about watching Alice In Wonderland in 3D even though it hadn't been filmed in 3D; the same is true of Clash of the Titans. Shot as a normal 2D film, it was digitised for the sole reason of money: 3D is more expensive to watch, so the box office will be bigger. There is no other justification, and I did not want to see it in 3D; however, finding a 2D screening at a sensible time was almost impossible, and I ended up in the 3D screening. I really wish I hadn't – it didn't do anything for the film at all.

I guess I only saw this film because I quite like Greek mythology (one of the reasons I saw Percy Jackson and the Lightning Thief, which stole some of the thunder on that front), and an affection for the original 1981 film, even though I know it's not very good. But at least the original film had a narrative – this film just jumps from one action piece to the next without logic or reason. According to nerdbastards.com, the film was originally rather different but was cut to 'simplify' things, but the result is even more of a mess; this at least explains why this film is such a load of nonsense.

I could bore you my issues with the movie, like the lack of reason for why Perseus (Sam Worthington; very bland) is chosen for the mission to find the tools to save Andromeda, the princess of the vain mother was gets her into trouble in the first place, or the lack of logic in why they have the massive scorpions turn up (before they end up using them as transport), or the bizarre inclusion of Djinn in a film loosely based on Greek mythology, or the awful dialogue, or the unlikeliness of the pairing of Pete Postlethwaite and Elizabeth McGovern as Perseus' adoptive parents, or the idiotic 'cameo' of Bubo, or the fact that the theme of the film (Perseus doesn't want to be a demigod, he wants to be human) completely misses the point of the Greek mythology – trying to superimpose banal 'humanistic' traits on stories that were all about the gods of Olympus playing with mortals shows a complete lack of understanding. But it looks I failed in that regard.

Some good things? Erm, Ralph Fiennes is good as Hades (although I felt a bit sorry for Liam Neeson as Zeus), as are some of the older hands who are part of Perseus' team (Mads Mikkelsen, Liam Cunningham). The CGI is all right, I suppose – it was hard to tell with the mess of the faux 3D. But that's all I can recall. I hope you managed to avoid it in the cinema like any other sensible person, and I'm depressed that there is going to be a sequel.

Rating: DA

[Explanation of my updated film rating system]

Notes On A Film: Crazy Heart

Crazy Heart is not the sort of film I would go to the cinema to watch. A film about an alcoholic country music singer/songwriter who was once famous but is now playing small bars is more of my dad's thing; if it wasn't for Jeff Bridges finally getting his Oscar after all this time, I could easily have waited for this to arrive on DVD or even television.

The story is not exceptional – Bridges is Bad Blake, going through life with no connections, drinking, having casual sex, no contact with the son he had with his first (of many) wives, angry with life. After he crashes his car, the doctor tells him that he has to stop drinking and smoking and lose weight, but he continues his life until a woman (Maggie Gyllenhaal) comes into his life. Love seems to be turning Blake around but when he manages to lose Gyllenhaal's young son in a mall, the relationship ends and Blake realises he has to change his life, going into rehab with the help of his old friend (Robert Duvall). He turns his life around by writing songs for a now famous country music star (Colin Farrell), whom Blake used to mentor. It's a very formulaic narrative, only made watchable by the acting.

Jeff Bridges is always good – everyone knows that, right? Whatever film he is in, he will be good, so I expect that from him. So Bridges is very good in this, but I'm not sure if it's worthy of an Oscar. It is impressive that he sings the songs himself; he sounds really good, and I'm sure that they are good songs if you like that sort of thing. However, like Al Pacino, Bridges was rewarded for his body of work rather than the particular role/film. The supporting cast is good as well – Gyllenhaal is excellent in a role that could have been much less, and an uncredited Farrell is very good as the younger star (and seems to be channelling the look of my oldest friend with the ponytail and dark shirt with the top two buttons undone). The director, Scott Cooper, is a former actor so it's understandable that the film is about the performances rather than the story; he adapted a novel into a script that allows the stars to do their thing. However, he does an accomplished job and the film looks lovely, capturing the light of New Mexico and the intimacy of the actors.

The film is good, but it didn't need the visit to the cinema. Bridges is entertaining as always, but the film (which was originally intended to go straight to DVD) is nothing extraordinary apart from some fine performances.

Rating: DVD

[Explanation of my updated film rating system]

Notes On A Film: Alice In Wonderland (3D)

This is a film that should have been left in 2D – it was not filmed with the special 3D cameras, and you could see that it was a 2D film coerced into 3D in parts with fuzzy background characters in certain scenes, and it hurt the visual beauty of a Tim Burton film, which is one of the main attractions. If it wasn't for the fact that the story didn't hold itself together very well (another aspect of a Burton film), I'd almost want to see it again in 2D just to see what it actually was supposed to look like.

The story is a cheat based on the title – this film is NOT Alice In Wonderland, i.e. an adaptation of the books; it is a sequel that incorporates aspects of the two original books. Alice (newcomer Mia Wasikowska, looking both like an adult Alice and and an archetypal Burton woman) is a Victorian woman being forced into a marriage who falls down a rabbit hole when the man proposes in front of everyone at a garden party. When she reaches the bottom, she discovers Underland (see what they did there?), which is Wonderland under the control of the Red Queen (Helena Bonham-Carter in excellent form as an over-the-top loon, with a digitally increased head). The inhabitants are happy to see Alice again because they believe that she is the realisation of the prophecy who will be their champion and return the place to its original state.

The story, written by Linda Woolverton, is silly in the right places but turns into a clichéd fantasy tale in the end, with big battles and Alice wearing armour and killing the Jabberwocky; it doesn't fit with the rest of the film, feels too generic for such an absurdist narrative and seems a bit of a cop out. The compensatory factors are the actors and the wonderful production values of the scenery. Johnny Depp is great as the Mad Hatter (playing him as a schizophrenic with a perfect Glaswegian accent when he gets too mad); Crispin Glover is wonderfully creepy as an elongated Knave of Hearts, the Red Queen's chief henchman; and there are great vocal performances from the likes of Stephen Fry as the Cheshire Cat, Alan Rickman as the Caterpillar, Christopher Lee as the Jabberwocky – in fact, there's lot of English voice work (as I noted previously, with a Harry Potter Factor of 6).

Despite the 3D problem, the film does look well designed – Burton and Lewis Carroll are a match made in heaven, and the visual style is vibrant bright colours and odd shapes and strange concoctions. The Mad Hatter looks suitably odd, the White Queen (Anne Hathaway) looks suitably ethereal, the Red Queen looks mad, her castle suitably demented, and the animals border on the Disneyesque but with the Burton feel, especially voiced by British voices such as Timothy Spall and Michael Sheen. The shift from the drabness of Victorian England to the dazzling, clashing colour of Underland is perfect, and the film works well when throwing the characters together and not worrying about the bothersome plot of fighting the Jabberwocky, as Burton paints his moving canvas with élan. However, the story must find resolution and the film leaves you unfulfilled.

Rating: DVD

[Explanation of my updated film rating system]

Notes On A Film: Green Zone

It's not surprising that this film didn't do as well as it could have done, although it is a shame – it is an intelligent action thriller, exactly the sort of thing to give the genre a good name and provide a thought-provoking yet simultaneously exciting film, something of which there aren't enough, let alone this good. I think that the marketing didn't help – pushing the idea of Matt Damon in an action role set in the current day with the director of the Bourne sequels didn't do the film any favours.

Damon is Chief Warrant Officer Roy Miller (based on a real-life version) who is leading a team looking for weapons of mass distraction in Iraq; the locations turn up empty and he questions the intelligence, something that is dismissed except by a CIA officer (Brendan Gleeson) based in the Middle East, who tells him that the next place on his list will be empty because it was searched two months ago. Meanwhile, Clark Poundstone (Greg Kinnear) is a politico trying to line up the next democracy in Iraq with a former Iraqi politician, while towing the line on the veracity of the intelligence, who also gets involved with Miller. There is also a reporter (Amy Ryan) to represent the entirety of the fourth estate and its complicity in the second Iraq war, giving another side to the point of view as to what is occurring in Iraq. Things turn when Miller captures a henchman of one of the high-ranking soldiers in Hussein's army, only for Special Forces to descend (led by Jason Isaacs, wearing a fabulous moustache, and upping the Harry Potter Factor of this film to 2) and remove him immediately, leading Miller to do some digging to find out what is going on around him.

The film is very much about what Greengrass feels was wrong with this war and the people who made the decisions, and so the audience has to pay attention to what is going on and have some idea of the details of the time. However, it is not just people talking – it's also an exciting action film, particularly the final act of the movie, as the film climaxes explosively. There is perhaps too much of a feeling of resolution to the film, which feels a little strange for a story that is trying to represent a complicated real-life situation and also confusing the boundaries between a documentary and a fictional film (even though it is 'inspired' by a non-fiction book about the events). However, it doesn't detract from a film that is well directed, well acted, smart and exciting.

Rating: DAVE

[Explanation of my updated film rating system]

Notes On A Film: A Single Man

A Single Man is a day in the life of a middle-aged English college professor (Colin Firth) in Los Angeles in 1962 as he decides that he doesn't want to live any more after the death of his long-term younger partner (Matthew Goode) in a car accident. During the day, he gives his lecture, has a conversation with a student (Nicholas Hoult), has dinner with his oldest friend, another ex-pat who still loves him (Julianne Moore), while preparing for the final day of his life; throughout this, he flashes back to various time points in his relationship with his lover.

This plot summary doesn't necessarily do the film justice; this is a beautiful film that is both beautiful in its depiction of a relationship and the effect it has on the person left behind, and also as a beautiful film to look at. Tom Ford is more famous as a fashion designer, which might explain the quality of the visual element of the film, but he also co-wrote the screenplay, an adaptation of a book, and this is an amazing debut for a first-time director. Everything about this film is perfectly controlled and very assured, and it is also an extremely moving film about homosexual love in a mainstream setting.

I've never understood the hype of Firth the actor, but here he is simply amazing; he was a thoroughly deserving winner of the BAFTA for Best Actor (and he gave the best acceptance speech of the night), with a performance that is controlled but emotive in a non-revealing fashion, as a fastidious man who is detailed about every aspect of his life, requiring a very specific performance and demeanour from Firth, even though he did look a bit like a young Michael Caine with those glasses. The other main actors are excellent, especially as they are performing with non-native accents (Goode and Hoult with American accent, Moore with a fabulous English accent, and giving a particularly moving performance), but it's Firth to whom the film belongs.

This a very good film that leaves an impact; it lingers in the mind for days after, with its perfectly choreographed and created visual style and powerful examination of grief. It's a shame that Jeff Bridges had to win his much deserved Oscar for Crazy Heart, because I think Firth's performance was the finest of the year (even though I think that Bridges is a better actor). It will be very interesting to see what both Ford and Firth do next.

Rating: DAVE

[Explanation of my updated film rating system]

Memory: I want to take you to a gay bar

Another memory. Didn't mean to have another so soon. We shall see.

An acquaintance had recently come out after moving to London. Either as a show of support or because the girls wanted a legitimate excuse to go to a gay bar, he invited us to the Rupert Street bar, on Rupert Street in Soho.

I think I was brought along, as friend by proxy, because I didn’t have the traditional British male values towards homosexuality, i.e. I don't hate gay people.

I didn’t have any particular objection or desire to visit a gay bar; I don’t even like pubs, so a gay bar is just a pub with better décor and more disco music.

The odd things: I felt very fat, despite being in relatively good shape; I felt really badly dressed and groomed; and I understood what it felt like to be a woman because blokes were staring at me in the manner of assessing sexual characteristics. This last was the oddest – I don’t think I’m the gay type but, having lived in Clapham for a while, I was told by my girlfriend that I was eyed up by men more than she was, so it shows that men are complete sluts regardless of their sexual preference.

I don’t recall much else about the short time spent in the bar – it was, after all, just a bar and I don’t feel natural in any bar. I don’t drink or smoke, so it’s not my milieu; so it doesn’t matter, gay or straight: it’s just somewhere to be with other people before going somewhere else.

The girls loved it, just for the novelty and the way camper gay men act around women in general. They also had fit gay men to look at – there weren’t any fag hags to be found.

Perhaps Rupert Street wasn’t gay enough; the hardcore crowd probably see it as a tourist pub for the newly out, the acceptable face of the gay bar scene. So I can’t judge from my experience. It was nothing special. I don't know what the song was all about ...

Meeting Margaret Thatcher

It is a hot Saturday evening, so I thought I'd share an old memory, doing something a little different. I might try doing this again, if I feel like it has any value.

This is a true story.

Not ‘A True Story’ as in Fargo, where the fiction of the truth is used to make the fiction more heightened. This is an actual true story of events that actually occurred to me.

It was 1980. I think. It could have been 1981. I'm not so good with chronology.

Margaret Thatcher, Member of Parliament for Finchley (at the time – apparently, it has now been abolished as a constituency. Thank you, Wikipedia), has been Prime Minister for a year, the first (and so far only) woman to hold the position.

I am an ordinary (although utterly adorable) 10-year-old (11-year-old?) boy who plays football for his primary school team (we don’t lose a game we play all year – we even get in the local newspaper) and reads a lot. These two things don’t usually go together, which could explain a lot of my many discrepancies over what people expect of me. I was raised in Finchley, a town in the north London borough of Barnet. I also play football for a local church team – not the church I attend locally; I’m not quite sure how this happens. I remember scoring a goal for the under-11s (under-12s?) team on my birthday on our first game, a semi-final, played at the Welsh Harp.

Somehow, the chairman of the church football club has organised an exchange trip to play football against a local team (church team?) in Le Raincy, a suburb of Paris (and twinned with Finchley). Somehow, even more implausibly, people in the local Conservative party heard about this and thought it would be a good idea to have Mrs Thatcher meet some of us at the local party headquarters for tea – presumably to show that, even though she was Prime Minister, she hadn’t lost touch with the common person in her constituency.

A selection of players from each team and associated managers/helpers (including my father) are invited to tea. I am one of those select few. I don’t remember anything about the actual event itself – I was a child, for crying out loud – except Mrs Thatcher mocking me directly. The nation may have felt that she took the piss out of them on a national scale, but for me it was personal. When gathering for the photos, we did age-specific group shots first before having others participate. My father was asked to join the shot with the young players like myself. He wasn’t quick enough for my liking, so I called out, ‘Come on, Dad!’ To which Mrs Thatcher added, ‘Yes, come on, Dad.’ in a gently mocking tone.

Bitch.

Personally, I believe that a woman who can ridicule a 10-year-old child can do anything to an entire country without ever losing any sleep.

There is photographic evidence of this meeting. You don’t get to see it. Don’t ask. But this is a true story. It’s good for ‘Bizarre Facts People Don’t Know’ when you join a new office.

This has been a memory.

From A Library – Green Arrow/Black Canary: The Wedding Album

Green Arrow and Black Canary Wedding Special #1 by Judd Winick and Amanda Conner, Green Arrow and Black Canary #1–5 by Judd Winick and Cliff Chiang

Although I think The Adventures Of Barry Ween, Boy Genius is one of the greatest comic books ever, I've not been a particular fan of Winick's mainstream superhero work (and I've tried). Fortunately, he wasn't the reason for trying this – the draw was to see the interior art of the two artists, Conner and Chiang.

Conner draws a very sexy comic book, but not in that pervy manner that certain male artists draw (with their butt shots and large breasts); her art is very light and there is a wonderful sense of fun – the look of optimism on Superman's face, the great facial expressions on Green Arrow and Black Canary's faces when they argue, and then make up, the girls having fun on the hen night. It's a delight to read this book solely because of the art, with Conner excelling in both the comedy and the action. And the heartache of the end – quite a shock ending to the wedding special, to set up the ongoing series.

Chiang is an artist whose covers I've admired for many years but haven't seen any of his interior art before. He is a different artist to Conner, not being as cartoony and light, but he still draws beautiful comic books, and a great Black Arrow, without being a cheesecake merchant. He has a simple, elegant line – he doesn't have a lot of excess lines on his faces or bodies to differentiate aspects; just a strong line to the outline and very minimal lines to the anatomy. It's very good, and he draws heroes that look noble and heroic and pure, with a sort of modern art nouveaux influence (I think – I'm still not good at describing my appreciation of artists in comic books), and it's good to see that his interior art is as good as his covers, which have always been excellent.

Regarding the story – I was mostly pleasantly surprised by Winick's form on this. The Wedding Album is actually very enjoyable, playing along with the usual form of a superhero wedding going wrong, but having fun along the way, with nice banter between Black Canary and Green Arrow and some good jokes (even if it's perhaps a little on the mature side of things for a family-friendly superhero comic). The ongoing series has a strong opening – as Canary refuses to believe the obvious, and a trip to Themyscria (where the villains turn out to be somebody else entirely) and a daring rescue; however, I didn't like the out-of-nowhere turn and the resulting mawkishness. I know it's going somewhere with the storyline in the rest of the series, but it slightly irritated me the way it turned purely for the shock value.

Still, the pictures were pretty ...

Bargain Bag: Marvel Zombies 3

Marvel Zombies v3 #1–4 by Fred Van Lente and Kev Walker

I don't really get the appeal of the zombie thing – it's all rather grim, even with the black sense of humour that usually accompanies it. I've enjoyed some of the films (Shaun Of The Dead, Zombieland) but they're more comedies than zombie films – I think the fetish for watching zombies tearing apart humans for flesh is perverse, but whatever floats your boat, I guess.

I read the first Marvel Zombies, mostly because the library had it and I wanted to see what the fuss was all about – if it hadn't been for Sean Phillips' art, I don't know what the point was – so it seems a bit odd to try some more, especially as I bought these four issues for £3 from the Gosh! bargain shelf. The reason was Fred Van Lente – even though I haven't talked about it yet, I love Incredible Hercules so I thought I'd see what a solo-written mini-series by him would be like (I rather liked his MODOK's 11), even if it's a zombie superhero comic book.

This is, more or less, an Aaron Stack (aka Machine Man) story, which just happens to have zombies in it. Using the iteration of the character from Warren Ellis' Nextwave, this is actually a rather funny romp with lots of references to the less explored areas of the Marvel universe. This means that the story starts with Aquarian, Jennifer Kale and the Conquistador and Siege being attacked by a Deadpool from the zombie dimension (and a panel cameo for Man-Thing), and a central role for Morbius the living vampire. Not usual players in a Marvel mini-series. Stack is guilted into going on a dangerous mission to the other dimension to acquire uninfected blood to find a cure when the director of The Hollow says he was going to send Jocasta on her own. However, it's mostly an excuse for lots of over-the-top action (as Stack kills lots of zombies) and lots of humour – Stack: 'So. I can eviscerate all the fleshy ones I want, with zero consequences ... and on top of that, they'll pay me for it? This isn't a zombie universe ... this is robot heaven.' 'I'll admit the chainsaw is a tad cliché ... but I've always had a soft spot for the classics.' To Morbius: 'Dude. You just staked the zombie version of yourself. You are going to be in therapy for the rest of your life.'

I don't have any time for the zombie stuff – there's a nice joke about Black Bolt being able to talk and not being able to shut up – but I still find it unpleasant seeing a double-page spread of superheroes munching down on humans; I'm obviously a squeamish wimp. It's unpleasant and I don't care for it; however, the scripting and plotting from Van Lente is fantastic, and I could read further stories of Aaron Stack, super robot for hire, solving problems across the dimensions ...

Bargain Bag – War Is Hell: The First Flight Of The Phantom Eagle

War Is Hell #1–5 by Garth Ennis and Howard Chaykin

Another Gosh! bargain pack (£5 for the five issues) and a real bargain – this is really good stuff from Ennis and Chaykin. Ennis is well known for his love of old war comics, and has been doing as many of his own as he can create (the majority of his output at Dynamite at the moment are war comics). There is a good reason for this – he is very good at writing war stories; the camaraderie, the horror, the black humour, the sacrifices, the sense of honour are all themes that populate his work.

In this story, Karl Kaufmann is an American who flies to the front lines of the First World War in his own plane to join up to a squadron of American pilots under British command. He is naïve, idealistic and unprepared for the realities of warfare – Ennis provides an introduction to the harshness of being a fighter pilot in its infancy: planes made of wood and wire, no breathing apparatus or parachutes, most dying before even seeing the enemy. Ennis shows Kaufmann's development and his relationships with the various officers and men and what it means to be a pilot, doing so with skill and humour (the 'buggering incident' is one such example, as is the tattoo).

After seeing Chaykin's work on slightly lesser material, it's great to see him working on something that is really good and to see him doing a great job as well. He draws the horror of war with great skill, but the majority of the book is about people talking to each other (Ennis has a lovely way with dialogue, revealing story and character without it coming across as flat exposition)), and Chaykin's facial expressions and storytelling are a perfect match for the tone and material. Of course, Chaykin draws Kaufmann as his typical brown-haired, square-jawed hero type, but it fits that he should look like that, and his style was always more suited to the early half of the previous century anyway.

I don't know how Marvel justified the money they must have paid for such top talent on a book that presumably didn't sell very well, but I'm glad they did: this is a very good comic book.

Bargain Bag: Immortal Weapons

Immortal Weapons #1–5 written and drawn by various

The Immortal Iron Fist was a fantastically good comic book – the job done by Matt Fraction, Ed Brubaker and David Aja on the character of Danny Rand, the introduction of the legacy of Iron Fists, and making a martial arts superhero comic book work at all in the current climate is simply amazing. It was a shame they decided to move on to other things, but at least they left behind some great comics and the scope for more.

There were two reasons I picked up these comics, another Gosh! bargain pack (£5 for the five issues): the examination of the legacy of the immortal weapons of the immortal cities (as introduced by Fraction and Brubaker); and the fact that Jason Aaron was writing one of the issues (I think my recent posts indicate why). The first issue, a story by Aaron about Fat Cobra, is the best of the lot – Fat Cobra hires a writer to compile the story of Cobra because he has drunk so much in his lifetime that he can't remember all the details. This allows for the interesting parts to be highlighted (such as being the only survivor of a team of kung fu commandoes put together by Union Jack to take down Hitler's secret death squad of SS ninjas, or the food-eating contest in Olympus versus Hercules and Volstagg), but also revealing the more prosaic and unfortunate aspects of his life. It is illustrated well by a selection of artists and is a good story with lots of kung fu references.

After this, the the quality of the remaining stories is uneven: the story of the Bride of the Nine Spiders doesn't really add up to much and the art is a little on the ugly side; the story of Dog Brother #1 is a downbeat tale with an ending that turns it and finally sees the arrival of the lead character; the story of Tiger's Beautiful Daughter (written by Duane Swierczynski, the man who took over the reins after Fraction and Brubaker) is a bit silly and slight; the final story of John Aman, Prince of Orphans, is more like what I expected from this mini-series, with an adventure that included Danny Rand, a giant dragon, and Aman fighting ten thousand dead warriors, comprising a good comic from writer David Lapham and artist Arturo Lozzi, which is almost as good as Aaron's story.

The series also has a back-up story running throughout, a five-part tale by Swierczynski about the current Iron Fist; it's a rather slight tale as well, not helped by the transition in art duties from the interesting Travel Foreman to the rather ugly stylings of Hatuey Diaz (a hint for Marvel: artists who draw ugly spandex costumes on their heroes shouldn't be used on superhero stories, even if they are good artists). All in all, an unsatisfactory package, with only one cracking story and lovely covers by David Aja.