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My Film Rating System

***** out of DAVID

So, most reviewers use a five-star system for rating movies. Probably due to the economy of five instead of ten stars on a page or film poster. There are five letters in my name, the number of letters therefore relating to the quality of the film, and the letters used indicating something about the film as well.

DAVID – A perfect film, just as I too am perfect. Everything about this is wonderful, a classic in the making, an example of what cinema has to offer; again, similar to me.

DAVE – A good film, a film you could recommend to your mates, reliable, fun, worth the effort, just like a Dave is a good mate, reliable and fun to be with.

VID – Wait until the film comes out on video. A good film, not great, fun for some, maybe not for others. Don’t bother going to the cinema to see it, unless you like that sort of thing already.

DA – Like a District Attorney, the intentions were noble in the beginning, but you have to remember that, in the end, he/she is still a lawyer, and therefore questionable. This film probably seemed like a good idea, but it didn’t work out the way it should. Some nice bits, but really not worth it.

D – For ‘Deplorable’ or ‘Despicable’ or ‘Diabolical’ or ‘Disastrous’ or whatever; you select the adjective of your choice. A film so bad, it makes your eyes bleed, makes you question the sanity of the people involved, or wonder how the film got made in the first place.

Apologies in advance if you have to keep looking at this post to understand my film reviews. I’ll keep a link to it on the side when I sort out my links.


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